Another cup?

I discovered coffee when I was 25 years old. My oldest son was shy of being 4 months old and I was desperately trying to shed the last 15 lbs of baby weight. I started to add my meal replacement powdered mix to whatever kind of java was around, first just to help cut back on the intense sweetness of the meal replacements. Then, I realized the energy it gave me! It was not a short lived energy either! I was able to get so much done that I could also enjoy some (very caffeine induced) comical conversation with anyone willing to listen. Wow. I remember how good it was. I then became a self induced coffee drinker. Not for the taste, but for the high.

Now, I have been drinking so much coffee that when I have a cup I get that instant gratification of energy, but now it is very short lived. Then if I attempt to reinstate the coffee high, I end up exhausted. Too much coffee makes me tired now more then it gives me any sort of pick up.

I decided over one week ago or so that I was going to put my coffee addiction to a halt. Put it on the back burner and save my stomach from any further damage then what had already been done.  Coffee had become an addiction to my hands, lips, and physical output. So cutting out the coffee also meant cutting out the comfortable familiarity of holding something warm and I just can't seem to get into drinking tea.

I was finally able to stop cold turkey! I had the worst headache for the first day, the second day it subsided immensely. Day 3, I went for a hot chocolate, day 4 - a green tea. Then day 5 came around and I felt like I was in need of some comfort food. Coffee, is my comfort food. I thought one small coffee will be fine, and it was! The next day, I was able to go without once again. Then, the day after that and the day after that..... I had a coffee.....and the day after that....another coffee....Today I decided against the idea first thing in the morning. But man was I ever out of it today! I was downright blue. So by the afternoon I had enough of my sorrow and opted in to have a cup of coffee. It was supposed to be small. But, by accident from the constant use of the words "I'll have a large double double".... I screwed up. But I drank that coffee anyway and I've never felt so good!

Guess that was a big FAIL!

Lulu